Things I saw in Spain according to my facebook albums
3. Portugal (not Spain, but whatever)
a documented romp in Spain
3. Portugal (not Spain, but whatever)
It was a pretty humdrum night. The only thing halfway exciting is when I somehow inspired the ire of a crazy shoeless gypsy man who spit at me and called me a fucker (in spanish). Still not sure what that was about. This morning I woke up, and Gasper had found a fortress of solitude.
I am not sure where the box came from, but she loves it. At lunch today Ángel was like “are you in your box? yup!”
Our goodbye dinner was last night. It was on this lovely patio/terrace thing. Unfortunately there was some seat saving going on (“saving seats? what are we? twelve?”-nikki) and I ended up sitting at the grownup table with all the professors. There was one other kid in our group that ended up sitting at the grownup table with me, his name is Aaron and we had not met until that dinner. Halfway through the dinner it emerges that neither of us drink.
Aaron: Where have you been the whole trip?
Me: I don’t know! Where have you been?
All the lost possibilities. (Mom before you ask if he is a nice boy, he has a girlfriend). It was fun sitting at the grownup table though. I got to hear them talk about the students which is always fun. They also told me that I am officially a Spanaird because I said my host mom makes the best tortilla española here. “Your mom always makes the best tortilla española.”
Oh my god. Oh my god.
1. There are no words to express how joyous and happy I am that I was in Portugal the weekend I was.
2.Mother, I am going to tell you now that the foul language I use in this post is mostly direct quotations from my señora.
When I asked Soledad what happened with baby, she asked me why I wanted to know. I told her it was just general curiosity and wasn’t necessary to know. She said it was fine, but she was going to wait until I was done eating. She then laughed at my face when I heard that and looked at my food and then back at her. My response, “I don’t know if I want to know now.” She laughed again.
She began the conversation while I was eating about baby’s general rudeness. He doesn’t say goodbye, he goes out drinking every night, he expects them to do everything, his water usage, la la la. This has been covered generally by me, but I thought he acted better, with his punctuality and stuff. I learned last night that the punctuality was definitely in response to the threat of being sent home.
So the weekend I went to Portugal Baby got sick from drinking. In a fun twist he was not sick in any way that I would normally associate with drinking. Soledad emerged from her room in the middle of the night, she normally does bed checks apparently, I was always asleep during these. She went into the kitchen and smelled something terrible. She went back and turned the light on. Now I am going to use her exact words “montones de mierda” or in english “piles of shit.” They were apparently all over the hallway, bathroom. He had stepped in one and left footprints. She (obviously) freaked out. She ran to his room and knocked on the door, his response? “I’m fine.” Yeah. He later told his teacher that he had a stomach problem, but as Soledad said “if it was a stomach problem it wouldn’t have been in piles like that. It would be messier.” Apparently the next morning he showered for like 40 minutes and didn’t clean a single thing up. He left everything disgusting. Threw his clothes in the trash (didn’t even take the trash out) and just left the house as is. His teacher’s response to Soledad? “He is used to having his mother pick up after him.” You are fucking kidding me right? He also made it sound like Soledad was lying and that it wasn’t as bad as she said. “I should have taken pictures and shown him.” She asked the teacher to come to the house and look but apparently he is just as spoiled as the kids and said no. Also earlier that week Soledad had said that she would take baby to the doctor if he didn’t start eating more (he was hungover everyday that first week). Baby denied that this was necessary and continued drinking himself silly. And then this happened. It certainly explains why the bathroom smelled like bleach when I returned. It is definitely good I wasn’t there. If I had emerged for one of my middle of the night bathroom runs I probably would have ended up puking everywhere and only added to the stress of Ángel and Soledad.
Anyway sorry for such a long post, but come on Baby, really? As Soledad said: “He is so spoiled he needs a diaper”
Apparently. Yesterday was the first dinner since baby has left and it turns out Soledad and Ángel kinda sorta hated him. I didn’t guess that at all! They were impeccably polite and stuff. Makes me worry about me. All I gathered is he did something VERY BAD the weekend I was in Portugal. It lead to Soledad calling Cursos and they offered to send him back to the US or move him or something (here it’s sorta fuzzy). She declined. I didn’t pry last night into what he had done but I think I may do so tonight at dinner. Whatever it was must have really annoyed Soledad because “He was the first student I didn’t wake up to say goodbye to”. Damn. What if all the things I thought was good about Baby (his politeness, his punctuality) was just a response so he wouldn’t get sent home. Baby, art thou a bad pug?
I love when the Spanish guys here think I am hardcore checking them out, and then they realize I am just looking at their dog.
I also love that many men here walk the most feminine looking dogs. I saw this butch guy walking a tiny ass poodle the other day. It was great.
I also saw this man (not that butch unfortunately) walking a tiny yorkie terrier. That yorkie was my favorite dog here so far. It apparently could not walk properly. It hopped everywhere. Like all four legs off the ground at the same time. Not only did it hop, it couldn’t hop forward. It kept hopping in this weird diagonal pattern. I mean it was a happy dog, but it was hilarious to watch.
I don’t typically say much about Ángel. I think part of that reason is he doesn’t really say much. He is a lot harder to understand than Soledad, but really he is a great guy. So I decided to make a post talking about how great he is.
1.He loves Gasper. Like a lot. This morning he was walking around the apartment, I thought aimlessly, but then he was really happy when he finally found her: “Oh! She’s under the chair. Ok” He also joins us outside on the terrace when I am harassing her out there. It’s great.
2. When it doesn’t come to water use (I am lookin’ at you here baby) he is really chill. I showed up late for lunch once after I got lost on the way back from the bus station and he just kept repeating “tranquila, tranquila” (“chill”) and told me to eat slower because he wasn’t in any rush. I think the two things he says to me the most besides greetings are “deja” (leave it) and “tranquila”. Apparently I try to help cleaning up too much. Or I just do it wrong. Who knows.
3.He sings to himself around the house. Usually its just a small humming, but sometimes when he thinks my door is closed (I think) he actually sings the words. It’s great.
4.He is totally whipped by Soledad and doesn’t care. Her mother, la abuela, came over for dinner the other night and stayed the night. He woke her up in the morning and gave her breakfast and took her home (I am assuming, she was gone by lunch). He returned this morning with the groceries. He cleans. I am pretty sure his assurance of masculinity comes from when Soledad needs help figuring out the TV, and for all I know she is faking that.
So here’s to Ángel!